Healing is an interesting beast. When you break you leg, there is a period when you have to stay off of it. The only responsible thing is stay off it. After a while, you have to start moving it around to re-hab it. It’s a really painful process because muscle atrophies and well.. that just sucks. Then, sometimes you need corrective surgery to make things right. Then sometimes God just touches you and says, “No more. Go run like you were meant to.”
It has been an interesting journey of healing for me. I’ve come to realize that I’m never going to arrive. Not that things haven’t been made right, but because I’ve always been in need of healing. At first, I thought it was a bad thing. I’m starting think it points more to real health.
I’ve been dealing with some really weird almost phobia like fears that started within the past 4 years. It has been really debilitating in my life. I would get to the point of having shortness of breath at times. Along with that, I’ve been really confused mentally in different social situations. It almost felt like social anxiety mixed with ADD. I thought that I could just work through them as I stepped out. I’ve come to find out tiime does not heal all wounds, it only buries them.
I’ve been to multiple counselors and prayed through some of the stuff myself, but I just wasn’t getting through it. Last week I made a phone call to someone in our church that connects people to prayer ministers. It really felt like I was calling a mob boss. So, I hear you know people who can take care of these sort of things…Anyway, I pulled up to a house at 8:30 p.m. and met two guys I’ve never met before. I felt slightly crazy, but man I wanted to get free from this stuff. They prayed for me for about an hour and asked me a few questions to guide them through my baggage. Man, I had more junk in the trunk that I was even aware of! We prayed for a while and nothing crazy happend, but I remembered feeling lighter. It was a really normal prayer session with two awesome guys going to bat for me.
The next day I was in a classic situation that I would normally break down in and I had total freedom. I had total peace and I’m completely free! Not only that, my mind was clear as a bell. It’s hard to explain how big of a healing this is for me, but I feel like I have my life back again. I’m so glad to be part of a family that takes care of each other. I know I’m not finished, but this one felt good.
Inactivity is activity if you in that part of the healing, but then you have to start moving the broken stuff around. You might have to drive to a strangers house to get the healing you need. Its all God work, but it’s our job to open the door and let him in. Don’t settle for being burnt out, bitter, and angry. You weren’t designed for that. We have a God that is more than capable.
